bringing it back old school

Los Angeles County Fair
1101 W McKinley Ave
Pomona, CA 91769
http://www.lacountyfair.com/

price: $$
veridict: try it!

when i was younger, little carnivals would open up in empty lots near chinatown and my parents or my aunt would take us. for a poor kid like me, that was the closest way to get to a disneylandish experience. ok, far from it. it's more like disneyland's fart these carnivals were and we farted these farts several times while growing up so they hold a special place in my memories.

today, i went to the l.a. county fair for the first time and it absolutely reminded me of those carnivals from days of yore. but let me start from the beginning....

the car line to get in was monstrously long. it was the last weekend for the fair and admission was $1 before 1pm. hello!

after parking in arkansas, you get the option of taking a tram or paying one of these western world rickshaws to take you to the entrance. i decided that if i'm going to partake in some of the infamous fair world fried foods, i better walk my jiggly butt there. it was not far at all, but i heard people huffing and puffing around me....dang.

one dolla?! one dolla?! holla! normal admission price is $17 during the weekends. i like this price a lot better. wouldn't you?

ahhhh, the memories!!! it's like those ghetto carnivals i use to go to, but this one is HUGE and there's white people! lots of them!

i remember sliding down one of these on a potato sack. for a split second, i imagined what it would be like to go zipping down one of them again, but all i could think of was a slippy slide accident with me being seriously embarassed. no thanks.

i also remembered these. it's a table with rainbows painted on them and if you slide a quarter right in the middle of one of the colors (it can't touch any lines or any colors), you can win a prize. the mofos manning it were pretty strict. i didn't bother with any of the games because i would have to line up to get a card before i can play. no thanks. i don't need that oversized frog to carry on my back. no, i really don't.

OF COURSE it's time to eat. i was hankering for some bbq and went to big bubba's bad bbq. who knew that this bus just brought in a load of bad bbq. if i knew, i would have stayed away! ack!

look, i tend to like my bbq sauces on the sweeter side, but the bbq sauce on this pulled pork sammich was DISGUSTINGLY SWEET. i bet you the ingredients were: sugar, water, and sugar. i was capable of only a few bites before i chucked it out. the side of beans were ok and the coleslaw was standard vons fare. do yourself a favor and don't waste your money here.

the sweet corn was alright. you can't do much to eff up sweet roasted corn though. i got this from bubba's with a free coupon in the coupon booklet you get when you buy your fair tickets.

dessert tally-ho!! i LOVE, LOVE, LOVE frozen bananas. they are as close as i can get to a healthy-ish dessert and you must have the nuts, too! you CAN'T have a banana without the nuts, but if you do, it's called a modified eunuch. go look that up.

here's two sticks of deep fried heart stoppers. they look the same, but they ain't. one is a deep fried snickers bar and the other is a deep fried reeses peanut butter cup molded into a log. can you guess which is which? not to let you guys down, but i only took a bite or two of each. first off, every bite means another extra block or two when i walk charlie. my fat ass shouldn't go crazy on this kind of shit and i'm GLAD i thought it was ick so i didn't.

but if i HAD to choose between these two monstrosities, i think the snickers one is better because the nuts (gotta love me some nuts) gives it texture when you eat it but the reeses one is just mush. both failed in the department of being a good fried product though because the outer breading is way too thick. i would not eat these again. NO!

fried snickers on a stick. hubba hubba?

the reeses peanut butter cup is le oozy and le mushy. me no likey no no no. me want $4 back.

then it was off to look at things and to shop if i was so desirous of doing so. here's a dude giving peeps a free taste of his nuts (is it just me or are there a lot of nutsack references today?).

yes, your eyes ain't deceiving you. it IS a dodgers inspired coffin! wtf?! would you ever be caught dead in one of these things?

i couldn't leave without taking a looksie at the smallest horse ever! teenie weensie? really?

this man charges $1 per adult viewing and 50 cents for kids. man, those dolla bills be building up! look at that line!

here's a look at the mini horse. don't tell me i never do anything for yah!! i just saved you a buck! can't quite see his face cuz he was in his feed the whole time...stop eating fatso! look at your nonexistent waist! the owner said he's about 10 years old.

and of course i bought something!!! i walked by a plumeria vendor and couldn't resist these pretty plants so i bought two! my sis went to hawai'i not too long ago and brought home a plumeria stalk to plant in our garden. her stalk didn't produce any flowers yet but these potted plants did so i bought them. they were HEAVY. i had to use a rickshaw to get back to the car cuz carrying it across the fairgrounds was tough enough.

pretty aren't they?!

the l.a. county fair will be open one last day (tomorrow, sunday), for $1. if you can't go, perhaps you will try it next year. for sure, the best thing i got other than the plumeria plants was a bottle of refillable lemonade at hot dog on a stick. $2.50 refills will keep you hydrated throughout the day. fun times!