Thursday, November 5, 2009

seven out for the maple tree

craps is my poison. here's the typical shit that comes out of my mouth when i'm at the craps table:

"2 dollars c and e"
"one dollar on all the hard ways"
"5 on 5, 5 on 4"
"hard ways back up"
"hard ways working"
"1, 2 on a hop"

and i always, always say PLEASE even though i'm flinging my chips at the dealers when i establish my bets. if i'm lucky, i can crap for 1+ hours...3 max. if i'm not, then i'm 7 out in 15 minutes. at any one time, i can have about $34 on the table for one roll. not bad, but in hindsight, not good either right? $34 can buy me food, a basic neccessity, or it can buy me the thrill of tossing those ruby red dice. my chinese blood always chooses the thrill...gambling is genetic and i won't deny my roots.

but sadly, i usually walk away empty handed from the craps table and i catch myself in a remorseful state the following morning. usually, the pathetic-ness of my situation heightens because i find myself in a whacked out establishment eating cheap food because me pockets be empty! the maple tree was such a place to wallow in remorse.

first of all, the positive reviews of it on yelp are WHACK. the maple tree is a nursing home meets greasy spoon and i don't want to be in a nursing home nor eat from a greasy spoon. if you ever go there, you'll know what i mean AND they play 80's music. weird. though i liked eating my eggs with tiffany's "i think we're alone now" playing in the background.

aiming for something simple after a previous night of gambling complications, i ordered myself their traditional breakfast. scrambled eggs, potatoes, sausage, and bacon....the toast was really buttery. i could have wrung it out and hung it up to dry with a pool of butter forming on the ground and the toast would STILL be buttery. everything glistened with grease and the only difference between this plate and denny's would be the mom and pop factor of it.

a friend decided to get the fried steak which was a thinly hammered out piece of beef, battered then fried, suffocated under a ton of gravy. ewwww.....methinks deliciousness left this plate a LONG time ago.

i would never come here again. even though it was SUPER CHEAP, you will pay dearly as your heart clogs up from their generous use of grease. so in the end, who wins? certainly not i, as i sat there penniless with an extra fat roll given to me by the maple tree....i also recalled a lonely tear drop that rolled down my left eye as stared out into the distance thinking how vegas wronged me once again.

The Maple Tree
6000 Spring Mountain Rd
Las Vegas, NV 89146
(702) 362-5151

price: $
verdict: not worth my time
The Maple Tree on Urbanspoon


  1. That plate of gravy looks very good to me..

  2. i think we're alone now. doesn't seem to be anyone around. i think we're alone now. the beating of our hearts is the only sound... man what a song. don't worry. i'm sure you'll win big next time! 10-4 (that's the only numbers I can recite and it has nothing to do w/ craps. sorry).

  3. afro- you lucky you skinny dude. gravy is like asking for it.

    yjs- if i win big, i buy you a purse!

  4. Wow, I totally agree, I wouldn't go to this place from the looks of that food alone!

  5. south bay- yes, say no to chunky gravy that will give you a chunky body. eww...

  6. take home point: yelp is wack. haha!


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